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  • Writer's pictureAli Craig

WHEN YOU AREN’T FEELING THE LOVE

In business and your personal life, it is easy to have moments where you don’t feel love.


Baring that the issue isn’t with you- aka, you are personally grounded- it can be hard to broach the topic that a relationship isn’t living up to what you want it to be.


Here are a few ways to ensure this intimate conversation goes exceptionally well.


  1. Location matters. Do a little reconnaissance and choose a neutral location that is new to you and your client.

  2. Timing matters. Neither party should be rushed to arrive or to leave.

  3. Inquire about them 85% of the time. You are feeling hurt. But most likely, your pain is stemming from their pain. Do NOT jump into it's all about your conversation because it isn’t. It is all about them.

  4. Listen. Not with your ears, but with your heart. Stay focused and grounded at the moment. No matter what they say, no matter if they get accusatory, stay in the moment and listen openly.

  5. Don’t stop asking questions or start replying till they have nothing else to say.

  6. Repeat. Once they are completely done talking, repeat what you heard, acknowledge it, and then state how you feel- factually, not dramatically.

  7. Don’t leave until there is a resolution. Even if the resolution is to agree to disagree, it still is a resolution.


What does any of this have to do with how you feel?


Relationships are a two-way street. And most likely, if you aren’t happy, they aren’t happy either. By taking the steps to create a supportive and neutral environment for both of you- true resolution can occur. By allowing the other party to speak first and fully you allow them to be heard. The simple act of truly hearing someone is the greatest gift and most honoring act you give to someone. This act of respect gives you a full picture of what is going on and shows your heart for the relationship.


Plus, by the time you get to the end, your pain doesn’t feel so bad anymore.


Perspective is a very good thing.

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